porcelain_doll: (T. Kaname)
[personal profile] porcelain_doll
Title: arrest
Pairing: Asaba Yuuki/Tsukahara Kaname
Rating: PG
Summary: Yuuki steals a certain heart.

“I don’t like you.”

Kaname stares, long and hard at Yuuki standing before him. He isn’t surprised at all.

“Yeah, well, I—“

“I’m lying.”

Kaname pauses and stares at Yuuki again. He isn’t cocking an eyebrow because of the interruption (because he usually does, if he’s not angry enough to smack the nonchalant boy on the back of his head) but it’s that phrase now.

“So what are you—“

“That’s a joke.”

Kaname’s eyes slant then. Yuuki’s being extra annoying that day and he thanks the heavens that Chizuru’s already gone home while Yuuta and Shun are busy at the tea club (although Kaname thinks the two of them are doing something else other than tea) then he curses because why the hell am I stuck babysitting this person, as he and Yuuki wait outside the gym, by the vending machines.

Kaname lowers his backpack beside his feet to lean back against the wall there, crossing his arms. Yuuki stands in front of him, hands deep in his pockets.

“Anything else?”

Yuuki shrugs. “Can I knock on your heart?”

“Why would you—“

“I wanna see if it’s hollow or if you have batteries inside there instead.”

Kaname grits his teeth and he grips at his arms tightly. He isn’t annoyed anymore – he’s furious. But he holds himself back well because for some reason, I don’t know. I don’t even know.

Yuuki inches closer and Kaname wants to back away but it’s impossible now unless he somehow acquires the ability to pass through walls at that moment but that’s ridiculous. It’s ridiculous – like how Yuuki’s body is so close to his then.

“Hey, don’t you—“

And Kaname doesn’t finish again as Yuuki rests a palm over his chest and it’s strange – stupid - how his heart races and leaps into the other boy’s hand just like that.

“Oh,” Yuuki says as he keeps his hand on Kaname. “Look at that.”

Kaname closes his eyes, eyebrows knitted and cheeks amazingly, awfully red and peachy. But he doesn’t do anything else despite the strong thump-thump-thumping in his chest that Yuuki is probably (yes he is) enjoying.

“You should’ve knocked.”

“Really?” Yuuki hums. “If I did, will there be a mirror waiting inside?”

Kaname swallows a bit. “You—“

“Or batteries?”

Then Yuuki takes his hand back and pockets it once more. Kaname glares at him.

“I can’t—“

Warm lips cut Kaname’s words gently, a sweet tongue prying and wriggling, mingling with his own later on and the taste of milk coats his mouth with each passing second until breathing becomes a burden and they have to part. Kaname instinctively brings his hand up, lips touched to the back of it and he thinks how pathetic it is that his skin is scorching; his whole body is burning. Yuuki’s deep yet empty eyes pierce through Kaname’s confused ones.

“I don’t need to knock anymore. Your heart isn’t there anyway,” Yuuki says plainly as he shows his hand right before Kaname’s face- open at first before he closes it and forms a tight fist. Kaname blushes harder.


Yuuki tucks a thumb under his chin, staring at a very red-faced Kaname.

“Then again, in place of your heart in there, I might really see a mirror.”

Kaname tries to keep his glare at Yuuki but he gives up and sighs – heavy, relieved.

“Shut up.”

“Is my name here? Pictures of me?” Yuuki wonders aloud as he gives Kaname’s head a light knock. Kaname smacks his hand away. “I guess you can have those. Mementos.”

Kaname thinks, again, how ridiculous it is that he can’t get himself to shout or hit Yuuki (because he deserves it-that bastard) but he can get himself to smile a little instead.

“Yeah, thanks—“

“It’s okay if I take your heart. I’m lessening your burdens.”

And Kaname doesn’t understand what Yuuki means. “I—“

A hand clamps over his mouth and it’s as warm as his burning body.

“You don’t have to say it. It’s written all over your face,” Yuuki points out. Indifferent, a dagger wedging past a sensitive core to an empty void of ifs and could havesshould haves.

Their tomorrow never comes.

When they graduate and go their separate ways, Kaname realizes that he really has become hollow. In his chest really is a mirror now; a mirror that only reflects Asaba Yuuki perfectly and his heart is truly in Yuuki’s palm – his this and that, his entirety. Slowly, every single day, Kaname feels Yuuki crushing his heart in his hand. Then Kaname thinks - over and over - that it’s ridiculous.

“You didn’t even let me finish, bastard.”

It’s because Yuuki knows that Kaname knows. He knows, in the end, they’re still going to end up together but he knows that Kaname knows he’s scared. He’s scared of this and that, over there and over here. Yuuki knows that Kaname knows – he loves Kaname dearly, so very preciously but it’s that heart he’s worried about. That heart – the very same one that he fears of breaking, of losing one day, a few years from then.

So Yuuki keeps it to himself – a memento for when he sees Kaname again. When that time comes, Yuuki’ll make sure to give his own to Kaname as a replacement. Maybe a Here, this will suffice won’t it? Because Yuuki wants to think that by the time his own chest gets hollow, Kaname will be able to stuff it with everything he’s been missing all his life. And it’s Kaname – the boy’s worth a part in his life, in that cavity within his chest even if Yuuki’s aware that Kaname would just hit him most of the times; at all times, Kaname just makes him feel like he’s really Yuuki. Unlike manga, Kaname’s the guilty pleasure that Yuuki can’t stop wanting - and that’s worth plenty in such a quiet life. There’s a path they’re both going to take someday and it’ll be like high school all over again - only better.

And it’ll happen. Not if it happens but it will and they both know this. They sealed it in that kiss.


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July 2013

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